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Unexpected Social Norms – Russia Edition

Russians really aren’t as different as you would expect, after you get past a first impression stage with a Russian, you’ll find they are incredibly similar to Americans or western Europeans. There were very few things I found to be surprising, and they’re all quite minor.

First, if you text a Russian, even if you are friends, you should include a greeting. I will go months between texts with my friends and just jump back in and say “OMG did you see that so-and-so is pregnant?!” with no introduction. Even if you text someone regularly about the same type of thing, you are expected to start a text with something like “Hi X, how are you? Do you want to get a coffee with me today?” It’s a bit unnatural to me. Normally, I’d just pipe right in with “Coffee today?”

A side note to texting Russians, expect to see a bunch of single sided parentheses after texts. ))) You may be smarter than me and realize that this is supposed to be a smiley face, but maybe not. The reverse also works and ((( represents sadness.

Second, if you work in Russia, expect to change clothes and shoes constantly. I didn’t like this at first because I hate carrying stuff around with me, but it’s actually pretty nice, especially if you have to wear a uniform at work. You can wear something nice or super warm for your commute and for a possible outing after work, and keep your work clothes completely separate.

Third relates to holidays, specifically birthdays. Russians have a special skill for speeches. While the typical Russian is quite closed off, they tend to gush very sincerely for your birthday or any celebration get together. If you have a coworker, I would recommend spending a few minutes and thinking of some kind of speech about things you like about them and things you hope for their future.

Fourth is more of an observation, and not necessarily anything that will affect your life in any tangible way, unless I suppose you are a man, and you choose to date a Russian woman. When you walk on the street in Moscow expect to see at least one man with a huge bouquet of flowers. Flower shops are wildly successful because there are constant occasions to give flowers in Russia, and lots of rules and superstitions surrounding them. The type of flower is of course important, but surprisingly, so is the number- you must not give an even number of flowers no matter how many flowers you end up with because that is reserved for funerals.

And lastly, superstitions are rampant, but don’t regularly affect expats; mostly in the simple things that don’t happen normally anyway. For example, if a girl sits on the edge of a table, she will never get married, if you sit on the cold ground, you’ll be infertile, if you whistle indoors you’ll be poor, and everyone’s favorite, if you shake hands or accept a package through an open doorway its bad luck. Make sure you either step out into the hall, or you invite them inside.

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